Top 10 Lies North Koreans Are Told

The top 10 lies North Koreans are told, So have you ever wonder what it is like to live in the Hermit nation? Well… wonder no longer.

Number 10

Kim Jong Il invented hamburgers, in the year 2000, it was published in Minju Joson a North Korean newspaper that Kim Jong Il invented the cheeseburger only he named it the double bread with meat, inventive!! Jong Il was praised with inventing a new national dish and he unleashed it upon universities.

Number 9

Kim Jong Un is an international fashion icon, oh sure! like his dad before him, Kim Jong Un is allegedly an international style guru and people in the West, no! people around the globe talk about him in fashion magazines and aspire to replicate his style, the North Korean media tell citizens that Kim Jong Un’s trench coat is a particular focus of iconary. know that’s not a real word… and Kim isn’t a real icon, so deal with it.

Number 8

Eating dog meat improves your stamina Kim Jong-un’s regime has encouraged its citizens to eat dogs as it builds their stamina and also has more vitamins than other meats, lies, don’t eat dogs!! North Korean radio also announced that the meat called Dangogi is a medicine that can cool you down on a hot day, dog meat is one of the ways the North Korean dictator is trying to tackle famine in his country, he says dogs should be beaten first to improve their flavor which to me is totally rancid, his dad also famously encouraged people to eat sawdust, I’m not sure what’s worse actually beating dogs is probably a lot worse, don’t do it.

Number 7

North Korea cured Ebola, Cancer, and HIV, actually more accurately, North Korean think that Kim Jong-Un found these cures and basically every cure to every disease, ever, in June 2016 the dictator made the rather odd claim and announced it over the state media, North Korean doctors explained it to the masses by saying the scientists insert rare earth elements into gingseng before applying micro elementary fertilizers from the earth elements into the gingseng fields.

Number 6

Kim Jong-un doesn’t poo! he doesn’t! no, he doesn’t….Or so North Koreans think anyway… this is actually repeated a number of times in his official biography. A North Korean defector confirmed the crazy line in his memoir… Mr. Kang wrote about the dictator and his family “I was convinced, as we all were, that neither of them urinated or defecated. Who could imagine such things of gods?”.

Number 5

in school, children are taught that Kim Jong-un started driving age 3, won a Yacht race age 9, and wrote 1500 books at university, has nothing on his dad though, who walked at 3 weeks old and could talk in full sentences by 8 weeks, all bow down to the dynasty

Number 4

unmarried women cannot get pregnant, a young North Korean woman known as Miss Kim was taken out of the Hermit nation’s capital for the first time by a French photographer who interviewed her and in the interview, she said that everyone knows in North Korea the unmarried women cannot get pregnant.

Number 3

Nobody is Disabled in North Korea while this sounds like a weird funny little lie, the truth behind is actually really sad and really scary it seems that the regime leaves mentally and physically disabled people to die, sensational claims by Ji Seong Ho, a defector suggests that Kim Jong-un’s regime performs tests on these people, he said “the regime proclaims: there are no people with disabilities under Kim’s rule and everyone is equal and living well” he continued by saying while “that propaganda is going on disabled children are being taken away, suffering indescribable things and dying”. That’s really really sad.

Number 2

America started the Korean War …that old chestnut! now in actual fact, North Korea invaded South Korea with the blessing of China… but that’s not what North Koreans are taught, oh no they even have a Museum of American atrocities filled with a few key pieces of fake news. in schools teachers tell kids Americans and nasty wolves who want to come at them, while I’m down for the fact that things are kind of a product of perspective and Americans probably weren’t totally great in the Korean War this does seem somewhat far-fetch

Number 1

in North Korea people are told that Unicorns are real, Oh they had a lair in Pyongyang Rightio, in 2012 North Korean state media claims the archaeologists from the Academy of social scientists in North Korea’s history Institute said that they discovered a unicorn layer 200 meters away from a temple in the capital their evidence a rectangular rock carved with the words unicorn layer in front of an actual layer, the Korean Central News Agency said that this is proof that Korean king Tongmyoung, founder of the kingdom rode unicorns from 3 BC to 7 AD, cool right.